Website DIVISIONS (Over 600 articles to help you to grow in every facet of your life)
Written by Jimmie Burroughs Email to a friend-
Of all the things I have experienced in my life nothing has meant more than relationships. Relationships cost nothing, but the effort you put forth to build them. Nothing is more satisfying than good relationships. I like beautiful cars, but what can they do other than take you somewhere? Material things, while serving a purpose, cannot add one thing to your contentment in life…relationships can. That being true, it is of the essence to have good relationships. Here are 10 ways to improve your relationships:
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- Work on being more outgoing
- Put on a real smile
- Show kindness
- Be positive
- Be attentive to what others say
- Show an interest in others and what they are involved with
- Avoid sarcasm
- Use the other person’s name frequently
- Touch the other person’s hand or shoulder occasionally as you talk
- Avoid criticism
Work on being more outgoing
Actors, entertainers and models who do interviews and advertisements realize the importance of being outgoing. They appear to be excited about life and full of life, and eager to talk and share about themselves, and interact with others. A lot can be learned about being outgoing by just watching a person who is outgoing, and see how they treat others, and by observing their enthusiasm and zest for life.
Put on a real smile
It takes a lot less effort to smile than to frown, and a smile is inviting while a frown can be intimidating, and push people away. If you have a hard time smiling spontaneously, just think of something that is real funny to you and let the smile come naturally. One genuine smile can be worth a thousand words.
Unkind people are generally left alone. If building relationships is unimportant to you, then unkindness will guarantee that you will be left alone. Who wants to be a target for someone’s unkind words and criticisms? Showing kindness makes you an attractive person to others.
There are a lot of negative people everywhere you go; if you can be the opposite and be positive, you will shine like a star. Even those who are negative dislike someone who is like them. Being positive is seeing the bright side of life rather than the dark side. Talking about the lighter things of life lifts others up while negativism depresses and pulls them down. Here’s good advice: If you want to make others like being around you, try being positive for a change.
Be attentive to what others say
Ignoring others while they are talking to you is the height of rudeness and a #1 turnoff. Being a good listener isn’t hard, but it does take effort. Avoid looking around while someone is speaking to you. Don’t be thinking what you are going to say next. Do look them in the eyes. Ask them questions about what they are talking about. Give them 100% of your undivided attention.
Show an interest in others and what they are involved with
Showing interest in what others are doing is one of the greatest ways to bond with them. Also taking interest in what they have. For example, if someone buys a new car, show an interest in it; tell them what you like about it. I have driven up to a gathering of relatives in a brand new car and have them pay no attention to it at all, and I’ve even had someone to criticize the kind of car I just bought right in my presence. That is alright as far as I’m concerned because I didn’t buy it for them. However, it sure didn’t make me fonder of them, and did nothing to improve our relationship. I’m not saying you should be phony, and say something that isn’t how you feel, but I believe it’s possible to find something appealing about any new car or most anything, and be genuinely complementary in just about any given situation.
On a person’s social profile I read that they said they were sarcastic, and if you didn’t like it, you wouldn’t like being with them. My thought was I’m sure glad I have a choice because I definitely don’t want to be around you for one second my friend. It is amazing how some openly declare their obnoxious ways like everyone should just accept it rather than them taking others into consideration and making a concerted effort to change.
Use the other person’s name frequently
It was Dale Carnegie who rightly said that the sweetest word in the English language to a person is their own name. Amazingly some believe that they should wait a while before they say someone’s name after they meet them until they get to know them better. As soon as possible after you meet a person use their name and use it frequently…but don’t overdo it until it becomes obvious.
Touch the other person’s hand or shoulder occasionally
Touching another person appropriately is a means of saying I care for you as a person. I don’t mean grabbing on to a person and holding them. This can be an invasion of privacy and make a person uncomfortable. I’m talking about just a light touch. Always observe the three foot privacy zone and never get right in anyone’s face. If a person keeps backing up from you, you are too close.
Unless someone invites you to give an unbiased opinion on something, avoid all criticism whether constructive or otherwise. If someone wants your opinion, they will ask for it, but if you volunteer it, it is likely to be unappreciated. One of the most damaging things in a marital relationship is for one to be constantly criticizing the other, and the same holds true for any relationship. After all, no one is without faults, so who has the right to pick on others because of their faults. It has always been my belief that I have a fulltime job dealing with my own faults and trying to improve. It is not my place to work on someone else’s faults; that is their responsibility, unless they ask for my help or advice.
Of all my relationships the one that is first and most important is my relationship with God. He has made building relationships with others easy as well as important. He has added peace to my life that is beyond comprehension. Frankly, my primary interest in life is to share with others how they also can know God, and experience the same peace, and love for others that I’ve known. If you would like to learn more about how you can have a connection with God, CLICK HERE.
access the infinite knowledge of God, at least to some degree.
About the author: Jimmie Burroughs is a motivational speaker and author who has been involved in teaching Christian Personal Development for more than 30 years. There are hundreds of articles to help you on this website, Website Contents , in your person growth. Be sure to take vantage of the FREE offer to get the “Personal Development” eBook while available.
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